Seasons Change

lately, i’ve been sitting with this quiet realization that i don’t think i fully understood before… God is in every season. not just the ones that feel light and full and easy to recognize as “good,” but the ones that feel slow, hidden, painful, and unfamiliar too. the ones that don’t look like what i expected and don’t feel like what i was used to. the ones where everything feels quieter than before, and i’m left wondering why things don’t feel the same.

i think for a long time, i connected God’s presence to how a season felt. if things felt clear, peaceful, and full of life, then i assumed God was near, speaking, moving. but when things started to feel uncertain, when prayers felt quieter, when life didn’t feel as full or as obvious… i didn’t always say it out loud, but part of me wondered if something had shifted between me and Him. like maybe i had done something wrong, or maybe i wasn’t hearing Him the way i used to.

but i’m starting to realize that God doesn’t rotate in and out of my life depending on how i feel. He doesn’t come closer in the good seasons and disappear in the hard ones. He is constant. steady. present. the same God who met me in joy is the same God sitting with me in uncertainty. the same God who spoke clearly in one season is still speaking now… even if i’m learning how to hear Him differently. and if i’m being honest, i don’t think the hardest part of this season is that God feels distant. i think the hardest part is that things have changed… and i didn’t want them to. there were parts of my last season that i loved, parts that felt safe and familiar and full. i got comfortable there. i built expectations there. i quietly assumed it would last longer than it did.

so when things started shifting, i didn’t fully let go. i told myself i was “adjusting,” but really… i was holding on. holding on to what used to feel right, hoping it would somehow feel that way again. but it hasn’t. and that’s been confusing. because i’ve found myself asking, “why does this feel so off?” “why doesn’t this feel like it used to?” and “why does something that once felt so life-giving now feel so heavy?” and i’m starting to see that maybe the discomfort isn’t because God is absent. maybe it’s because i’ve been trying to stay in a season He already completed. maybe i’ve been holding onto something that was only meant for a specific time, and now that time has passed… but i haven’t fully accepted it yet.

it’s like being dressed for summer when it’s clearly winter now. standing there in what used to feel right, but now it just feels out of place. and instead of adjusting, instead of putting on what this new season requires, i’ve been standing there frustrated, wondering why it doesn’t feel good anymore, wondering why i feel uncomfortable in something that once fit so naturally and i think deep down, i’ve known. i’ve felt the shift. i’ve sensed that something is different. but acknowledging it means letting go, and letting go is hard when something meant so much to you. it’s hard to release what once felt like home. it’s hard to trust that just because something ended doesn’t mean something is wrong.

but i’m learning that seasons changing doesn’t mean God changed. it doesn’t mean He left. it doesn’t mean He stopped being good or stopped being present. it means He’s moving. it means He’s inviting me deeper, even if that deeper place feels unfamiliar at first and maybe the tension i feel, the discomfort, the stretching… maybe it’s not something to run from. maybe it’s an invitation to realign. not to strive, not to panic, not to try to force things back together, but to surrender. to loosen my grip on what was and trust Him with what is.

Ecclesiastes says there is a time for everything, and i think i’m finally starting to understand what that really means. it means some things are only meant for a season. it means what once felt natural might now require release. it means what once worked might now need to be surrendered. and that’s not failure. that’s movement. that’s God doing something new.

i’m also realizing that God is just as present in endings as He is in beginnings. i think i used to celebrate beginnings more because they felt exciting and full of promise, but endings… endings feel quieter, heavier, harder to understand. but that doesn’t mean God isn’t in them. it just means He’s revealing Himself in a different way.

i’m not losing God in this new season. i’m encountering Him differently. and if i’m honest, that still feels uncomfortable sometimes. it feels unfamiliar. it feels like learning how to walk with Him all over again. it feels like trusting without having everything explained to me.

but maybe that’s where deeper faith is formed. not in the seasons where everything makes sense, but in the ones where i have to trust who He is without needing to understand everything He’s doing. so if things feel different right now… if things feel like they’re shifting, closing, or stretching you in ways you didn’t expect, maybe it’s not absence. maybe it’s transition. maybe it’s God gently reminding you that He hasn’t left, He’s just leading you somewhere new.

and i’m learning that i have a choice in how i respond. i can resist it, hold onto what was, and stay uncomfortable… or i can trust Him enough to adjust. to release. to follow Him into what He’s doing now, even if it doesn’t look like what i thought it would. so maybe if it feels cold… it’s not because He’s gone. maybe it’s just time to recognize the season has changed. maybe it’s time to stop holding onto what no longer fits and start embracing what He’s inviting me into.

maybe it’s time to trust that He’s still here. still good. still present. still leading and maybe… it’s just time to put a jacket on.